Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Stuff on My Kitchen Table

Before I could put the muffins to cool, I had to clear the junk off the table. This is what I found.

  1. One mouth guard. (He has football practice tonight. Hope it isn’t important.)
  2. One pair of gym shorts. He has Birdie Ball tonight(that’s Decadent for badminton). Hope this isn't important.
  3. Yes, siree…folks, it’s Violinist’s cell phone. (He’s forgetful.)
  4. a landline phone
  5. an envelope
  6. and I think the grey thing with wires coming from it might be a voltage meter. It’s part of Geek Guy’s stuff. He’s been outside under a car hood. I think he used it for that.
  7. And a library book about digital photography, which because I'm a techie ditz, Geek Guy brought home for me to read in my spare time.
Perhaps now would be a good as time as any to explain that we’ve been married almost twenty-five years and Geek Guy is still trying to help me in the techie department. Give him points for that.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Oatmeal Raisin Spice Muffins

  • 2 cups buttermilk or sour milk
  • 2 cups quick-cook oatmeal
  • 2 1/4 cups all purpose flour
  • 1 Tbsp. Baking Powder
  • 1 tsp. Baking Soda
  • 1/4 tsp. salt
  • 1 cup brown sugar (not packed)
  • 1-2 tsp. vanilla
  • 2 eggs, beaten
  • 1/3 cup softened butter
  • 2 cups plumped raisins
  • 2 tsp. cinnamon
  • 1 tsp. nutmeg + extra for raisins
Dump raisins and 1 teaspoon of cinnamon into a bowl and pour boiling water just to cover.

Grate some extra nutmeg into this too, a good half more of a teaspoon.
The raisins are going to take a while so grease the muffin tins or line them with papers. If you are organized you might think to soak the raisins the night before. But you know how it is.

I didn’t have any buttermilk and amazingly didn’t have any sour milk lounging around in the back of the fridge, so I took 2 Tablespoons of white vinegar and put that into a 4 cup wet measuring cup and then added milk to equal 2 cups. Now it looks like baby spit.

Put your oats into a largish bowl, and stir in the soured milk.
Get the dry ingredients measured and sifted into another bowl.. the flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, grated nutmeg, a second teaspoon of cinnamon. Now whisk in the brown sugar.

Once the raisins are plumpish, add the vanilla, add the butter to the oatmeal mixture. Stir well.

Add the raisins but not the leftover spicy liquid. I kept it for my squash pies.
Fold in the beaten eggs.

Now mix in the dry ingredients… Stir it until it’s all mixed. Have that oven preheated to 400 F.

Spoon the mixture into the tins. This will make a full dozen plus eight or nine more muffins.
Bake at 400 F x 15 minutes. It may take a little longer but not by much. Test with a toothpick inserted into largest muffin. If it comes out clean you are done. If not toss them back in and bake a little longer.
Great Done! Now all I have to do is wait for Buff to come home to eat and drink and be filled.

Decadent Housewife ID Cards

I decided not to share a dull photo of the list, “Pieces of Identification Authorized by the Chief Electoral Officer of Canada.” Instead, here is a picture of, The Cat, doing drugs…RELAX…it’s only catnip.

So on this non-alphabetical list, “Pieces of Identification Authorized by the Chief Electoral Officer of Canada, (ALL CAPS AGAIN), are twenty-five Identity Cards and twenty Original Documents. Topping the list is, Health Card, beating out both SIN card and Canadian Passport. (We Canadians sure love our health care system. Bow down and kiss the earth.) Wonder if Canada Customs knows this.

Halfway down is “Employee Card issued by employer.” Hmmm, how hard would it be to whip up one of those things on a computer? For me it would be impossible. I would be laying on the floor, technologically overcome. I’d have to go get Geek Guy or Speedy. And Speedy would be, “DO YOU WANT to KNOW HOW TO DO THIS FOR YOURSELF, MOM? MOM?” Okay, Okay, I got your point, Speedy. He’s left brain, and has never stopped looking at me like I’m totally mad since the day we first met.

And how about a Student ID Card? How many times have you altered your student card or used somebody else’s? I was eighteen from 1971 to 1975. Those were the days. And if there were Decadent Housewife ID Cards, I might try it again.

Away down toward the bottom is “library card”. Really? How many times have you lost your library card? How many times have you found a library card? Gosh, I had no idea library cards are akin to SIN numbers or Canadian Passports. So why not my Fabric Buying Club Membership? It’s as important as my library card. Air Miles anyone? And how do these rules get made without my knowing about it? Or am I just reading the wrong news? Which brings me to something Buff wrote the other day for his Civics class, about China, Green Party Leader Elizabeth May and folk musician Dale Butler, but we’ll get to that another day.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Elections Canada Rules!

This arrived today. “New identification rules to vote!” Now are they shouting at me or just, clear-the-throat announcing, or are they actually excited about this? Or maybe this is just Elections Canada’s way of saying, “NEW IMPROVED ELECTION RULES! More powerful, more confusing.” Actually, this is what really grabbed my attention: “WHEN YOU VOTE, YOU MUST PROVE YOUR IDENTITY AND ADDRESS”. Really? This hasn’t been necessary before now? Really. It hasn’t.

No more, traipsing into the local school gymnasium to be greeted with, “Hi, how are you? How’s Violinist? And what’s he up to? Has he quit school yet? Gee you’re not on here, oh, that’s okay, we know who you are. Is Speedy coming in? Here’s your ballot.” And I have never seen this person in my entire life. So I stand there wondering who this polling officer is who says she knows me and knows Speedy and knows about Violinist’s educational escapades. And why does the other polling officer leaning into her right elbow, a man, whom I have also never seen in my entire life, keep grinning at me and nodding his head up and down?

Now I will have to arrive at the polling station and it will be all business. How dull. ..Elections Canada. I shall now heretofore have to produce a) “one original piece of identification”, b) two original pieces of identification or c) swear an oath and be vouched for by an elector who can be a neighbour or a roommate.

GG to polling officer, “I swear, this is Decadent Housewife, I should know, I’ve lived with her decadence for near twenty-five years.” Decadent Housewife to polling officer, “I swear, this is Geek Guy. See…there’s his pocket protector.”

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Violinist, Brake Pads and Listeriosis

Violinist and Med Student Friend traveled to the Maritime provinces. They spent a smokin’ hot Friday night in Montreal changing brake-pads on Med Student’s car. Saturday night, they called, “Please, look up places to sleep.” But they managed to hit camp on their own in a Wal-Mart parking lot. Next morning, they phoned again, “Please, look up second-hand shops in Moncton.” Violinist forgot pots and dishes.

“We have food, Mom, just nothing to eat it with.”

Violinist is funny that way. He forgets things. Like his shoes in the middle of winter. No kidding. He forgets to eat sometimes. He thinks about wine. He thinks about his violin. Except for the time he forgot his violin on his way to a gig. He thinks about his Ginger Dog, rest her soul. He thinks about his girlfriend. He’d thought about what was wrong with Med Student Friend’s car and bought new brake-pads. And then drove another four hundred miles before thinking to change them.

And because he is a violinist, he knows how to fix cars. Really? How’s that related? Another time.

By the time I got back to them, they were wandering around a Zellers looking for a cooking pot.

"Hi, it’s your Mom. Listen, don’t eat any processed meat, Okay? More people are sick and died. What are you guys doing?”

"Well, we couldn't find a place to sleep last night but we noticed some trailers bunched up in Wal-mart. We just pulled up with them and went to sleep. Now we need pots. Are there any junk stores here?"

"Yes, Ernestina found you junk stores."


"Never mind, you're too young."


"Listeriosis. Five people have died."

"Holy Moly! What about fresh meat and we cook it ourselves?"

"Violinist, you are in the Maritimes. Eat fish.”

“Hey Mom, how are you, today? It’s Violinist. So, yeah, we are in Prince Edward Island. Oh, we took the bridge. We slept looking out over the water. This morning, we walked about 2 km out on the flats. We’re going to go visit a winery. And then we’re going to go deep-sea fishing. Oh, lunch? I was just about to eat a hotdog.”